You feel that internal tug of war! On one side of you there is your job, your businesses, and your home commitments. The other side of you sees the red flags signs coming from your elderly mom or dad…forgetting things, lonely, can’t drive and constantly missing their supplements and medication. You feel frustrated and overwhelmed at times.
To top it off, you feel as if you are not doing enough. Plus, you may even need to miss work and your boss is taking note of that…
When you are with your aging parents and elderly family members…you are totally lost – you can’t find their financial or medical documents. How can you help if you can’t see the details of the paper work?
Or you have noticed that mom is completely lost since dad passed away. She has never tried budgeting or writing a check to pay her regular bills.
As you know, taking the time to help your aging parents locate their important documents is the most important of priorities. All important papers and documents should be stored in a central location in a security lock box, that includes all access codes, authorizations and keys in the security box in their home. (If the lockbox is locked attach a note telling where this key is located.) In times of emergency, those documents must be easily accessible and have proper signatures…..have you ever tried to go to the bank lock box without the key and signature??? Not a pretty picture!
Struggling to care for your aging parents can be costly to you financially as well if you are not able to maintain a job. The MetLife Mature Market Institute and National Alliance for Caregiving study estimates the average cost in lost wages, pensions and social security benefits for women providing care for an aging parent to be a staggering $ 324,044 ! SO making sense of all their paperwork and financial status may be a difficult task for you but something that must be done early on in the process. What if mom knows nothing about it and dad had done it all his life?
I discovered these hard truths 20 years ago while helping a 65 year old Speedway widow with her real estate needs. She had been married to a man with a predictable stable job and her husband took care of all their financial transactions and needs. She had no money sense at all…never handled the family check book and had never managed the investments or their household budget. After his death she was totally dependent on her out of state children, local banker and stock broker. She had no idea where to start!
Today 20 years later, there are women in their 70s and 80s who are clueless and confused about handling finances. How about the sandwich generation and caregivers of elderly parents? Where can we start the process?
As a daughter, a sister or granddaughter, if you are here on our blog, it is not an accident. We know from experience you are probably struggling and are probably looking for some help. Let us take the first and most important steps. Knowing what are the baby steps we can take to help ourselves as well as our elderly?
Here is a story from a busy son about his frail and elderly mom who was recently widowed:
“Since my dad passed away, my mom has been showing signs of depression and always forgets about her own needs and medication. I can’t take care of her every need while I have my own job and family to care for.”
We, at Keeping in Touch Solutions, hear lots of stories like this as well as thank you notes like this one from a concerned daughter:
“I am so grateful to have this service. When you called to say you had not been able to reach my mother, I panicked. I called the out of state retirement community where she lives and asked security to check on her. They called back a few minutes later to tell me they found her happily watching her favorite TV program- completely unaware that she had knocked the phone off the hook. Thank you again”.
If you are a working or single mom or busy working dad who may be struggling to the find time to check in with your elderly and aging loved ones every day, where do you go for help? We, at Keeping in Touch Solutions, provide the first step toward peace of mind. We do a daily personal, friendly check in call, on your behalf, to your loved one to be sure they are doing ok and to remind them about taking their medications.
Let us know how this was helpful by placing a comment here. Let us know if you have interest in monthly on line “Taking Baby Steps” seminars starting in the fall?
A daily check-in call could be the lifeline, the joy you give someone that makes the biggest difference in their perception of what old age is like.
Contact me at 317-480-1038 today. Let’s make a difference together.
I’m Diana Beam, Founder of Keeping in Touch Solutions. It is my heartfelt desire for every person to live a happy and healthy life in the place they call home, no matter what their age. You can’t put a price on peace of mind for your parents and yourself. It’s priceless . . . and significant.
For that reason, the goal of every Keeping In Touch Solutions program is to provide a caring connection and service that both the elderly and their caregivers can rely on to make living that good life easier.
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